Thursday, July 28, 2011

221:

Posted untuk pengajaran, terutama kpd yg sudah berkahwin, siapa yg rasa tak sanggup nak baca mushy2 stuff, takyah bacalah ye, spare urself from kutuking me. ;)

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Semalam genap 2 bulan kami bergelar suami isteri. Tak perasan sebenarnya, yelah, masing-masing di tengah-tengah kesibukan praktikum, kursus etc2. I wasn't (am not) very stable these past few days, mainly due to two main things: penyeliaan lecturer yg amat horrible (my situation, not the lecturer, although it's so tempting to say so, ish astargfirullah), dan of course, kerinduan. Bila stress makin bertambah-tambahlah rindu. Sebab orang yang memujuk tu jauh, walaupun call and msg je.. tapi, lainlah!.

Semalam juga nenek sampai ke rumah kami. InsyaAllah nenek akan menyambut 1 Ramadhan bersama-sama kami. Sambil-sambil minum petang, kami berbual. Nenek dengan soalan biasanya "Ngko macammana dengan suami? dah suka?" Hehehe. Rahsia la apa jawapanku ok.

Then masuk tajuk rindu.. aku mengeluh "Uhuhu... rindulah nenek, tapikan, bila tengok nenek, muna terfikir... yela, muna n dia ni, walaupun berpisah, rasa rindu, tapi at least tau insyaAllah weekend ni jumpa..tapi nenek, mesti sangat rindukan Tok Yek, kan? dan rindu tu takkan dapat diubati, sehingga akhirnya..." Aku baru terfikir yang mungkin sensetipnye soalan aku nih! ish munaaaa ..

Nenek mula tergenang air matanya. Tapi dia tersenyum juga.. "Dah 20 tahun, tapi rasa macam baru semalam betul Tok Yek ngko pergi. Sangat rindu, memanglah! Tapi sebab tu la sekarang nek kena ibadah betul-betul, supaya boleh jumpa nanti kat syurga! ....insyaAllah selamanya bersama kat sana nanti!"

:')


... tempat tiadanya perpisahan ... selamanya ... bersama cinta hakiki Ilahi ...

need to make sure I am syurga-worthy huhuhuhu ....
Ya Allah rahmataka arjuk ..

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

220: RPH

My teaching practicum started last week. Last week was it?? why does it feel like aeon already! Oh well...

I've been given 2 classes to teach. 4 periods of Physics and 5 periods of Mathematics.

... teaching is tiring. At the end of every class that I taught, I found myself sweating profusely. Penatnye menjerit-jerit. Apetah lagi kalau kelas yang belakang-belakang sikit. Bape kali pusing suruh copy je kot whatever at the front. Copy pun tak mau. Apekah...

I always wonder about all these children. What motivates them to come to school... I mean, they didn't even try to think, kot! Is it friends? or are they just scared of their parents? or they just want to finish school, just for the sake of having some kind of qualification? tapi kalau tak belajar tak lulus SPM tak guna juga. Kalau nak pergi sekolah kene bangun pagi-pagi sangat kot. Boleh pulak bangun pagi and pergi sekolah... yela, sebab one thing kalau tak dtg sekolah more than certain days akan dibuang sekolah. They don't want to be kicked out.They need to be in school. They know that.

Dah tu, alang-alang pergi sekolah, takyah bagi banyak energy pun, sikit je untuk usaha sikit. Ahh membazir aje... tengok derang buat muka blur, berbual sesama sendiri atau tidur je sepanjang masa... tak bawa buku, refuse to do whatever we say.. rasa macam, hai membazirnye awak pergi sekolah. It doesn't take much pun, just pay attention in class, and think. You'll go somewhere.... Tapi mereka taknak... haiya..

I am learning here... lots to learn still... banyak lagi yang masih saya cuba fahami...

Penatnye jadi practicum teacher... rph rph rph rph ...