Monday, December 27, 2010

200:

Ujian-ujian adalah menyucikan. Until we meet Allah in the purest state of the heart.

La ilaha illa Allah ..

---

Alhamdulillah Ya Allah...
Thank you Allah...

Thank You ...

---

Ujian-ujian adalah menyucikan.

199:

"Oh, ini ke anak kak dayat yang kat Mesir tu?"

"Eh tak, Melbourne" *senyum*

at different occasion

"Dah kerja ke?"

"Belum, baru habis belajar, insyaAllah akan jadi cikgu"

"Oh, ustazah ye? ngajar agama?"

"Eh tak, Physics insyaAllah" *senyum lagi*

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

198: Clarity

It's like, you are about to jump the bungee, but you pause for a moment before you let go. That pause. It doesn't mean that you don't want to jump. You just need that moment to be prepared. A moment of clarity. To be clear of what you really want. And how much you want it. Or maybe just to be sure that everything's alright if you let go now. Like, no tangled rope around your leg, or that your harness is really locked in place. Something like that.

I need to pause. I need to.




Not that I have ever tried bungee jumping :)

Monday, December 20, 2010

197:

Melbourne is more than 6000 miles away now. It's been almost a week since I arrived here. I tried to be ready for any possibilities of events. Expect the unexpected. And I guess till now I am calm. Yes, calm.

Change is good. I have the power to decide who I want to be. I choose to be who I think the best I should be. Idealist at the start, realist in the heart. Whatever that means.

This is a new beginning. Al-Muntalaq.

Allahummahdini. In each and every little step that I take ...

Sunday, December 12, 2010

196:


For everyone that's been asking, I'm not attending the graduation ceremony here. I'll graduate next year in Malaysia insyaAllah :). Nah siap ada award level.

Alhamdulillah ...

Saturday, December 11, 2010

195:

I'll be going back earlier than expected. Sedang cuak sekarang! mixed feelings... and my to-do list is endless!

Keep me in you do'a..

See you in Malaysia :) InsyaAllah

Thursday, December 9, 2010

194: 9 days


Alhamdulillah... all done!!


"Well, I guess you are considered passed now"


This maybe the last time I visited a beach in Melbourne



2 month old Sofiyah :) I made her laugh out loud for the first time! yay!



Thank you dear adik2 housemates :) I received lots and lots of chocolates recently, just now my fellow honours student gave me chocs as well. Urgh. Very bad very bad..



I guess I'll be needing a new specs soon. Aaa banyaknye nak guna duit balik ni...

9 days.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

193:

The future is something so scary. When you realized how scary it is, you don't feel like moving at all. Uncertainties. I hate uncertainties. But this just shows how shallow my understanding on the dependence on Allah.

Hasbiyallah wa ni'mal wakeel.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

192:

Results are in and my flight is confirmed to be on the 18th. But believe it or not I am not quite done here. I still need to do my talk which is scheduled on Thursday, next week. But no need to worry, just need to get it over and done with. In the mean time, I've got packing and shipping to do, friends to visit, people to get in touch with, a weekend retreat to attend, painful shopping for others, replying emails..lots of them! and the one I most look forward to: kitchen and toilet scrubbing. Oh yeah.

Keep me in your du'as ..

So long!

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

191:

The clock is ticking. My time here is coming to an end. Honestly, right now all I'm feeling is how I just want to leave this place. I cannot wait to be back. This year is emotionally exhausting and I am tired. But I am not running away. This is the right move. To let go. To move on. To survive. To revive.

I am not attaching my heart to anything. I know I cannot blame the place or environment on how I behave. It's just, the right thing to do. For me, for everyone else.

But truthfully I know, when I have settled down at home. I will begin to look back at all the memories and I will miss them. My first step on the land of Melbourne. The first breath of air that I inhaled. The sensation that I felt around the face caused by my own curve of smile. That was the beginning. And from there, everything else unfolded.

Orientation week. First lectures. Being lost at uni. First train ride to Caulfield. Car ride to Heidelberg. The beautiful autumn. Sydney for the first time. Brief stop at Canberra. Port Melbourne. Brighton beach. Winter. The cold yet warm winter. Jigsaw Puzzle. Ski trip, twice in a month! My rebellion. My confusion. Friends. Friends. Friends. Il Dolce and the long walk home afterwards. Expensive roti John and silly childish game at Argyle Square. Suprises. Spring. Tulips. Salam Perantauan. Laksa Johor. Ayam yogurt. Laksam. Iftar. 20th birthday... and so on .. sangat banyak!! and this is just a part of first year.

Yes I can remember them all now. But my thoughts and feelings are overwhelmed by the fact that I am leaving and I am so happy. I cannot really appreciate the memories.But that does not mean I don't treasure it.

Thank God for everything. Alhamdulillah. I have learned a lot. And that makes me realized that there are so much more to be learned.

Right now I am not really sure when I am leaving. When involving the ministry, I tend to be the 'malas nak layan' kind of person. So I will wait. They won't let me stay here forever, right? By hook or by crook I'm gonna be back by January, insyaAllah.


Friday, November 19, 2010

190: Hyperventilating

cepat la habis cepat la habis ... penat dah tengok benda yg sama.. can't imagine doing phd..

doa mesti terus peeps..

next is presentation...

I hope my supervisor does not google my name. First link that comes out is this blog! huhu..

Saturday, November 13, 2010

189:

Awak, mungkin Allah tak bagi something yg kita nak sangat, sebab kalau kita dapat sesuatu tu, kita terus depend on that something, and pergantungan kepada Allah tercacat...

it's not wrong to be dependant on people, but it is something dangerous ... supaya kita jelas 100% hati kita ini milik siapa... supaya kita sedar kemampuan diri yg sebenar... supaya meletakkan cinta pada tempat yg sepatutnya..

you know, macam Harry.. the author really understands this fact.. that's why she made Harry orphan.. that's why Sirius Black is killed.. Dumbledore too...because Harry was deceived by the presence of all these people..

Semoga awak sedar akan cinta Allah terhadap diri awak.. sedarlah, Allah loves you so much, and how dare you to turn away...

I just want to be happy

apa-apapun, back to basic my dear... happiness in this mortal world is never the goal.. in the hereafter, yes..

tadi on the way balik dalam kereta habis nangis.. oy oy! jangan.. blur mata tak nampak jalan.. dah lah tengah hujan... ye ke awak? bahaye!

argh stress dgn diri.. dan awak, saya takutnyeeee... whatever in store for me in the future..

"katakanlah kami ini adalah hanyalah miliknya Allah yang akan kembali kepadaNya kapan da dimana saja..." - tashiru

Monday, November 8, 2010

188: That's not the way it works

I wish that somehow
You’d tell me out aloud
That on that day I’ll be okay
But we’ll never know ‘cause
That’s not the way it works


My Lord show me right from wrong
Give me light make me strong
I know the road is long
Make me strong
Sometimes it just gets too much
I feel that I’ve lost touch
I know the road is long
Make me strong


~Sami Yusuf in "Make me strong" 2010

my theme song for this period of my life...

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

187:

I realized how little I know about you.

I wept because of the distance between us.

You are amazing, you need to know that.

And I am going to miss you.

This is ending too soon, ey?

.. and I still have lots to say

.. lots of things unfulfilled

.. and I'm sorry

But it is for the best..

Yes it is for the best.

InsyaAllah.

Sudden sparks .. dedicated to my Abrar

Friday, October 29, 2010

186:

Hampir aku hanyut kerana rindu
Pada harta yang pasti reput
Dan lenyap di sini
Hampir aku lupa pada Yang Kekal
Kejahilan menyelubungi jiwaku

Sekelipnya mata hilang semua
Yang hanya ku pandang
Yang hanya milik-Mu

Yang hanya kuidam
Di dalam pandangan-Mu
Bersama mereka terdahulu

Sungguh aku cari cahaya itu
Untuk menyuluh kelam ini
Setelah kudipaling
Sungguh aku hina menagih secebis
Keampunan-Mu setelah aku malu

Sekelipnya mata hilang semua
Yang hanya ku pandang
Yang hanya milikmu
Yang hanya ku pinta
Harapan keampunan
Hati ini telah kulukai

Sebaiknya manusia Kau ciptakan
Hinanya angkara diri sendiri
Sedegup jantung terleka
Dibuai arus dunia
Selangkah kau menghampiri kehancuran

Sungguh aku cari
Cahaya itu
Untuk menyuluh
Setelah ku dipaling

(Rast - Setelah Aku Dipaling)

Thursday, October 21, 2010

185:

I defered my graduation. Alhamdulillah tenang sikit rasa. Kalau tak stress juga nak siapkan thesis ni dengan kebarangkalian tak dapat nak siap asik bermain-main di kepala di saat perlu buat keputusan tentang graduasi dikala keadaan kewangan bukanlah di tahap yang best sangat, hundreds of dollar for an event.. wah pandainya mereka mencari duit tetapi tak se'pandai' kroni2 di Malaysia yang cuba mencekau RM5billion senang-senang sahaja tanpa menghirau suara rakyat-rakyat yg bayar duit cukai yg banyak dengan subsidi minyak yg dikurangkan dan duit tol dinaikkan.

Mortar board jadi motivasi, boleh tak? Eh mana boleh, murahnya nak beli diri. Wah ganasnya bunyi post kali ini. Saya seriously sedang stress tetapi masih boleh di kawal, tak caya tanya roommate, saya kelihatan sangat rileks sekali. Saya ada 9 hari sahaja lagi utk thesis submission. Tapi (hua.. kenapa tetibe mata berair ni) tapi saya banyak sangat lagi nak tulis. Tapi saya tak boleh tulis sebab saya tak faham. Ye saya tak faham banyak sangat walaupun dah hampir setahun kononnya saya bergelumang dengan projek ini. I don't even know what I've been doing. Saya merasakan bahawa satu tahun wasted. Wasted. Down the drain. Mungkin sebab saya perfectionist. I don't think whatever I get is good enough. Oh susah sekali mahu menulis sepenuhnya dalam bahasa melayu. Call me whatever you want. Lupa daratan is a good choice.

Thesis, y u no write yourself

*inhale* .... *exhale*

Okay. I am okay. I just need to let this out. There.

Dear Allah, help me .. bima syi'ta
.. I've been doing injustice to myself....forgive me...
.. Allahumma zidni ilman war zuqni fahman..

Dear all, please say your prayer for me pretty please.. hadiah birthday, boleh kan?

Friday, October 15, 2010

184:

I am scared.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

183: Behind the name

I like the response I get whenever I told my name to any local muslims here.

"Masya-Allah, what a beautiful name,sister!"

"SubhanaAllah! The wife of prophet Muhammad s.a.w!"

"Really? I also have a friend with the same name"

"I love that name!"

I don't like the response whenever I told my name to Malaysians.

"Klasik"

"Nama orang tua ek"

"Ape dia, again?"

"Oh.."

Or just a very meaningful smile.

---

Okay, saje je :)

Sunday, October 3, 2010

182: Jimat siang

Daylight saving starts today. Although I've been through this twice a year for 4 years in a row now, it never fails to confuse me in the morning.

Did my computer adjust its clock automatically? How about my phone? Do I have to change the setting anywhere? How can I tell when it has changed itself or not? Am I supposed to minus or add one hour?

Okay. so, dear family in Malaysia, now the time difference's 3 hours, thank you. I want to spare you the confusing theory behind all this 'saving up daylight due to the day becomes longer as summer is approaching" stuff, just accept the new time now, okay?

Happy Spring everyone!

Alhamdulillah ala kulli hal :)))))

Monday, September 27, 2010

181: Sakura 2010


Spring Aku & Kamu, Untuk Redha Allah

:)

Friday, September 24, 2010

180: Unusual of me, posting something like this

I have the ability to de-associate my mind from thinking about something. This comes in handy most of the time, and it's doing me good, keeping me from feeling too stressed due to the nature of just being a human; you have too many things to do with the little time you have..

But it's also pretty dangerous. I can let go of something so easily. (But this does not apply to something I really really love affectionately, this will be the topic of discussion in the coming paragraph). A task, a problem, a thought. I'll just tell myself "Shh.. stop thinking about it, let it go, put it aside for the time being". It's affecting people. And it can displaced the optimal stress I need to feel which supposed to be the driving force for me to work when the deadline is just, say, 3 weeks away???

Another dangerous 'thing' that yours truly has to deal with is OBSESSION. I easily get obsessed over anything that attracts me. Anything that intrigues me. Anything that switches on the light bulb in my mind. The eureka moment. It's something I appreciate having to a certain extent. I mean, that's how I can push myself to learn, gain knowledge and all.. but it can go a bit too far sometimes.

And I'm telling you, getting over an obsession is very hard, speaking from experience here.. and unfortunately, this is where my ability to deassociate becomes void.

What an irony. I just don't understand.

Just some random thoughts in the afternoon, while I am supposed to be panicking about my thesis but as you can see, I have succesfully deassociate my mind from thinking about it.

Thank you for reading, but really I'm just writing for my own reflection, my quest to find ways to fix me...

La hawla wa la quwwata illa billah. Allahummahdini..

Friday, September 17, 2010

179:

All the best, Ahmad.

May Allah bless and ease your journey there.

Jaga diri baik-baik. Belajar rajin-rajin. Cari banyak pengalaman.

Call mak/abah seminggu sekali at least.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

178:

:)

Balik Malaysia 2 minggu. Sempat iftar, solat terawih, bertazkirah, raya etc2 bersama-sama keluarga tercinta.

2 dunia, malaysia dan melbourne. Macam mimpi.

Mimpi dalam mimpi.

Sekarang sudah kene bangun, mai oi.

6 weeks. I have 6 weeks before submitting my thesis. 6 weeks. At this rate I should be working days and nights. Please, Mai.. start panicking, please?

Sekarang sedang demam. Rindu.

.
.
.

... innahu kana fi ahlihi masrura.. innahu zhonna an lan yahur..

I need some good reminders.

Friday, August 13, 2010

179: Namaewa Mai

Here's another round of random pictures taken here and there. Yours truly's life from the lens of her pink Sony Cybershot..


Sample WVM12.
There's this engraver in the lab that made me so jakun. I even engraved my log book which caused irreversible damage. (Mana boleh engrave kertas, munah oi.. walaupun hakikatnya kertas tu tebal dan keras!!)

This is the instrument that makes the most annoying sound in the lab. I'll only operate it when there's no one else in the lab.
Pelicans at San Remo.

Caramel Bread Pudding.
One of few very rare things I can 'bake'.
Dessert utk berbuka semalam :)
Happy I was, yesterday

The door to my lab.

Samples on the wheeeeels..

Waste of time...

:)
Another graduation. InsyaAllah!!!
Semoga segalanya berjalan lancar.
You and me.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

178:

Something traumatic happened last night on the tram. I swear I'm not gonna go back by tram at night ever again, alone. Walking seems much safer. Oh the irony of life...GOSH!! macammana nak lupa ye???

Today is 1st Ramadhan. Padan muka sendiri kot sebab balik lambat dr uni semalam padahal org lain sibuk nak habis kerja cepat2 and focus on malam pertama~~

Bajet rajin, padahal tak. I was waiting for MATLAB to finish calculating. It took such long time and semalam tu, when it finished, I realized I didn't do something correctly so .... so... such a waste of time.

Oh, patience. Ujian bergeduk-gedebuk pada 1 Ramadhan 1431 H.

Ya Allah, tempatkan aku sebahagian dr al-mukhlisin.....

On a happier note, my supervisor baru bagi green light utk balik Malaysia nnt. But he said, kene accelerate la buat segala apa yg boleh before balik ni.. oraito insyaAllah.

Alhamdulillah juga, walaupun sedih tidak dpt menyambut 1 Ramadhan kerana diberi MC oleh Allah.. tapi happy juga dapat menyediakan makanan utk org yg berbuka hari ini.. dear housemates, selamat berpuasa.. semoga dapat berbuka dengan gembira nanti :D

I love the positive feeling in the morning~~~~~

:D :D :D

maybe it's keberkatan Ramadhan.. but, yeah..

Alhamdulillah ala kulli hal..

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

177:

Ramadhan is here.

And I'm still alive.

Alhamdulillah.

Mixed feelings, though.

:(

:D

X)

:<

:)

:)))))

Allahumma barikli..

Monday, August 9, 2010

176:

What has changed?

Years passed with all the events in them. All the trials, hardships, smile, laughters and tears, without me realizing it, they changed me.

Mistakes made, hikmah gained.

Life's an art. You can't be rigid in living your life. There's no rules without terms and conditions. There's always space, where ambiguity sits.

I'm glad, actually. I never regret all those tests. (although at that time all i wanted to do was screaming at everyone or just locked myself up).

I ponder on what has become of me. The me right now, is very different from the one who wrote all those emails.. all those blog entries... (can't believe I wrote things like that! so embarrassing~~)

I feel loved.

"Allahumma balighna ramadhan.."

may you always have the will to learn, the will to pick yourself up after a heavy fall...

Sunday, July 18, 2010

174: Because that's the way it is

I miss the times when "sebab iyer.." satisfied all my "why?".
Life was so simple back then.

:)

..because, that's the way it is

Thursday, July 15, 2010

173:

Dear Abah,
semalam munah mimpi, abah kata abah tengah kaya sekarang, munah boleh minta apa-apa aje. So munah minta abah beli ticket utk akhir tahun ni.. for my graduation.

:)

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

171:

Hari ini birthday Nuha. Adikku yang ke *emm.. kira jap..* oh, yang keenam. Tadi bila nak wish, dok kira-kira birthday yang keberapa. Tetibe cam terkejut. Oh, 12. Dua belas. Dah beso dah adikku. Dan teenager.

Setiap kali kalau nak balik summer (atau balik msia la secara generalnya), mesti beli souvenir utk siblings. And when it comes to buy for Hayat and Nuha, mesti fikir beli gula-gula, coklat ke... atau pensil box warnawarni ke.. mainan ke.. stickers ke.. bende2 budak2 la kiranya.. but now, when I realize they're teen already, I guess that kind of souvenir dah tak appropriate kan??

Seriously, DAH BESAR! and time does pass us by.. just like that.. tak tercatch up.. adik beradik sendiri pun... apatah lagi sedara mara yang sangat ramai tu... bila tengok gambar2 masa majlis Pi'ee and majlis Ulfah... mulut ternganga je slalu.. wah tak kenal, wah dia ni dah besar! wah siapa ni.. wah dah ada anak dah.. wah wah wah...

I guess I've stayed here long enough. Nak balik.

No matter how hideous the reality is, there are always so much things that I'm grateful for. Hidup ni, adalah a life-long learning process... it's not just about enjoying the good things in life.. scrap that, it's not about enjoying at all.. kalau ada bende happy, great, bagus, alhamdulillah diberi peluang merasainya.. but, hakikatnya, hidup ini perjuangan, and when we said perjuangan, of course its going to be hideous. So, stay strong and focus, Mai!

Okay, tak pasal2 je masuk bab lain. I'm so unfocused right now. Emotionally unstable. I want to bounce back. Higher and higher. Taknak mati dalam keadaan down. Huhu.

Be good, all.

Doakan exam and assignments saya all goooooood~

Saturday, June 19, 2010

170:

"It's hard to write. But it's harder not to"
-Carl Van Doren

Sunday, June 13, 2010

169:

The internet used to be so private. I mean, I never had to be so paranoid if this or that person will read whatever crap I write.

I started blogging 7 years ago, when I was in form 4. At that time, barely any of my friends know what a blog is. Yahoo messenger's users were so scarce too. My online friends were mostly people I've never met; penpals and people that shared interests. Friends at school were busy studying biology, physics or all the school subjects while I indulged myself in HTML and CSS tutorials, website making tips, different blogging platforms, photoshop for hours and hours etc2 but php was beyond me I could never comprehend the tute (and never tried again after I finished school and started to get busy with the real life.. :p).

So, then, no one close to me really knew me (ironic nye, the real me was the one online...)..and I was happy with that. I mean, I never had to care if my school friends suddenly stumbled upon my blog since most of them didn't even have internet connection at their home, at that time.. I rarely finished my school work. After I came back from school, everyday, I'd spent hours on the computer. Or if I got the mood, I would draw.

The point of this post is? evident, isn't it? It's harder to write nowadays.

Friday, June 4, 2010

168: Syuhada' yang kukenali

When the Mavi Marmara was attacked, reality hit me.

I used to feel so distant and irrelevant about the conflicts. Yeah, people are talking about the genocide, open air prison, boycotting, the zionist conspiracy etc etc. Yeah, I was aware and I thought I understand the situation. I boycotted because that's a logical thing to do. I supported the cause. I said I'm fighting for them. "Untukmu jiwa-jiwa kami.. untukmu darah kami..". I felt utter outrage when the Israeli attacked Gaza early last year. How could them, yea? How could them. I understand the history.. I could explain what happened.. I could explain why we should condemn.. why the Palestine is our issue. I thought I really relate to all that.

But when the Mavi Marmara was attacked, reality hit me. Things are so close now. There were people that I know personally on board. My classmate's father was one of them. And my dad's friends. Allah, then only I realized the issue had never been that close to my heart... The worry I felt for them whom I know personally, is different from what I felt for Gazan. For Gazan, am I just pretending to love and care for them just because it's the right thing to do? For Gazan, my outrage and sadness, are they real? For Gazan, am I really fighting.. like I always said? "Ini perjuangan kita.. ". Do I express my concern on the issue just because everyone else is doing it? And the questions keep on coming.

When the Mavi Marmara was attacked, reality hit me. I always felt like Syahid is something so distant. But now, it feels so close. So close.... And yes, I can be one of the Syahidah insyaAllah!!!

Impikan the ultimate husnul khatimah.. mati syahid di jalan Allah...

----

Inna lillah wa inna ilahi raji'un.

Dari Allah kita datang, kepadaNya kita kembali.

Kepada keluarga Mc Kamaliah (@Tipah) dan Pakcik Sani, Husna, Huda, Maryam, Maddin.. semoga terus bersabar dan kuat. Allah pilih Jannah. Allah pilih keluarga korang semua.. insyaAllah pemergiannya dalam keadaan baik, the legacy she left.. is something that kita boleh menjadi saksi nanti untuk Jannah... didoakan smg Allah menempatkan Jannah di kalangan anbiya' dan syahidin.. yang telah memilih perjuangan sbg jalan hidupnya insyAllah..

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

167: SEM steps

Obviously I need more ideas to blog..

In the mean time, ambek ni..

Gold coat your sample ..

This is the machine.. XL30 Scanning Electron Microscope




then, report report report la.. (n obviously I haven't done it)

Sunday, May 23, 2010

166: Our Love Story

You said you love him.

What if anyone asks you..

"So, Mai.. tell me about your love story"

Will you able to curl a smile and tell that person without hesitation "Oh yeah, it's the sweetest thing, it starts when..."

Will you be able to? honestly...?

and with "Happily ever after!" at the end...

Can you say you're in love with someone but you don't have any story to tell??

--

I love Rasulullah...

honestly, Mai?

So, what's your love story?

:)

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

165: Nikmat dunia

Lord of the fries..
Fries with Belgian & Italian Sauces, and regular vege burger (with mock meat!)
Sangat sedap fries with the sauces itu... definitely am gonna miss this if i were to go back..

Alak nak makan kek, so I brought her to this cafe. Sahara...
Lemon meringue and Mars cake ..
cappucino and chai latte (heheh nyesal order chai ye alak?)


Our shopping place.. ALDI.. murah2 barangnye, sesuai utk budget student
Banyak juga barang yg 'suitable for vegetarian' so takyah susah2 cek all the emulsifier codes etc2.

Random shot.. di umah adik...

Huhu.. banyaknye nikmat dunia yg Allah izinkan kita semua rasainya..
And.. without questions I am willing to give all these up if it means I can go back and meet my family now and now...

Itu harga cinta..

And... it makes me think..

"in kuntum tuhibbunnallah fattabi'uni..."

Kalau benar kita cintakan perjuangan ini... segala apa yg perlu kita korbankan takkan kita sesalkan...

Benarlah kata seorang ustaz tu... "Hanya sesukar inikah harga syurga-Mu?"

Masih jauh harusku pergi..
Masih lama harusku renung..
Masih banyak harusku lawankan..
dalam diri ini...

164:

When I pass I don’t want to leave a life of regret
So I give rise to change today by trying not to forget
That pleasures do pass and sunrises end and stars do fade away
But it’s love and it’s virtue and honor and truth that remain for all days

.
.

I want that final breath to be the sweetest of all
And it will be with certainty if I answer the call
To help all those in need and decipher the meaning of life
Cause the seekers of truth they fear not death any more than they fear life

---

Tetiber hari ni teringat lyrics Kareem Salama ni..
I often need reminders...

Satria ESQ, go go go! Satria ESQ, fight fight fight! Satria ESQ, win win win!!!

heh, taksal....

Thursday, May 13, 2010

163: The return of Modulus

Oh Allah forgive me... inni zholamtu nafsi..

I need to submit the reviews for 10 papers tomorrow.... but I have done none. NONE. I was/am struggling to make sense of the articles... dah baca bape round still tak make sense.. macammana nak summarize??

Then my mind is preoccupied by unnecessary stuff. Oh Allah help me get rid of all these thoughts. At least for now. Tak payah risau bende2 yg tak pasti tu dik oi~ It's distracting! sangat...

And I've wasted yesterday since I was down with fever and couldn't get anything done... tula, procrastinate lagi!!

Oh Allah forgive me... aku menzalimi diriku sendiri... :((

(42:30)

Huhu nanges baca ayat ni.. Oh Allah.. thank you... :'(

Okay positive!!!!

Boleh siap esok dgn jayanya insyaAllah!!!

|-Maimunah|

:))))

Sunday, May 9, 2010

162:

Feel like calling my dear mama but she's in Makassar right now.

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Everyone lives. Everyone works hard for something. Everyone feels tired. Everyone feels pain. Everyone hurts. Everyone feels joy. Everyone wants happiness. Everyone has dreams. Everyone races against something. Everyone lives. And everyone dies...

".. wa fizalika fal yatanafasil mutanafisun.."

Just make sure your fight is worthwhile. Remember the eternal abode. Not the transient rest you feel after achieving what you thought was your dream....

Am I making any sense here?

--

2 assignments to be submitted tomorrow. Another one this Friday. SEM procedure needs to done ASAP as well..

Ya Allah, beri aku ilham...

Thursday, May 6, 2010

161: Manual

Dia kata "Yes, you can ask people and get the answer.. but how can you be sure he has the right answer? always refer to the manual! The manufacturer knows better." So true isn't it? Of course he's refering to the handling of the machine in the Colloid lab. But...

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

160: Random

Thank you dear adiks for the treat..

Ape-apelah ui~

I hate the walk to class. It's too busy. Too noisy. You can see Victoria Market there..


Multi-million dollar project :p cikai tak cikai my hons project. Heh, just kidding. This is just me preparing the glass slides for my use in electron microscopy..