180: Unusual of me, posting something like this

I have the ability to de-associate my mind from thinking about something. This comes in handy most of the time, and it's doing me good, keeping me from feeling too stressed due to the nature of just being a human; you have too many things to do with the little time you have..

But it's also pretty dangerous. I can let go of something so easily. (But this does not apply to something I really really love affectionately, this will be the topic of discussion in the coming paragraph). A task, a problem, a thought. I'll just tell myself "Shh.. stop thinking about it, let it go, put it aside for the time being". It's affecting people. And it can displaced the optimal stress I need to feel which supposed to be the driving force for me to work when the deadline is just, say, 3 weeks away???

Another dangerous 'thing' that yours truly has to deal with is OBSESSION. I easily get obsessed over anything that attracts me. Anything that intrigues me. Anything that switches on the light bulb in my mind. The eureka moment. It's something I appreciate having to a certain extent. I mean, that's how I can push myself to learn, gain knowledge and all.. but it can go a bit too far sometimes.

And I'm telling you, getting over an obsession is very hard, speaking from experience here.. and unfortunately, this is where my ability to deassociate becomes void.

What an irony. I just don't understand.

Just some random thoughts in the afternoon, while I am supposed to be panicking about my thesis but as you can see, I have succesfully deassociate my mind from thinking about it.

Thank you for reading, but really I'm just writing for my own reflection, my quest to find ways to fix me...

La hawla wa la quwwata illa billah. Allahummahdini..