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Lepas kahwin, agak awkward juga nak update ... conscious. Huhu. Semoga Allah membantu diri menjernihkan niat dan menjaga diri di alam tanpa batasan ini (this internet, i mean... and its fitnah yang sangat unpredictable)... lagi-lagi sekarang sedang dalam fasa tidak berapa stabil, praktikum mengajar nak mula dah (takut! and stress sbb byk submission tak finalized lagi.. pdhl semuanya harus disubmit before going off to practicum) and berjauhan dgn encik suami (lots of new feelings after marriage ni, unfamiliar to me... pelik rasanya kadang-kadang... ).

Subhanallah atas kebesaran dan Maha Hebatnya Allah mengaturkan kehidupan... Alhamdulillah atas segala nikmat yang Allah beri peluang buat saya rasai ... sometimes it feels so surreal. Since I have in my family,some kind of history that involves mental illnesses, I couldn't help but check myself... is this real? or am I just creating stuff in my head? .... haha.

Anyway, for those who didn't know, my husband and I didn't know each other before. Well of course kenal sbb nak kawen, tunang n stuff... tapi takdela bercinta.. and I don't think I've known him well enough, even now. And I am not regretting it at all ... this is where the interesting bits come in... the process of ta'aruf dalam perkahwinan... and sangat menguji iman dan istikharah kita... anyway... I think it's still too early to say anything pun.. baru sebulan... :)))) May Allah continue to bless and guide us throughout this marriage... apapun, kita sbg manusia beriman dengan segalanya ketentuan Allah itu adalah tarbiyyah dalam kita menjadi hamba yang paling Allah redha kan... tak kisah lah baik atau buruk pada pandangan manusia, yg penting baik pada pandangan Allah. Only that matters.

Hamza Yusuf said... "Marriage is not to make you happy, it is to make you holy..."

But if you feel happy, than that's the bonus... as long as you still membalikkan segalanya kepada Sang Maha Pencinta ...

... and I am happy.

Oh... praktikum starts next week! another new adventure that I'll be taking... takut and feel so unprepared. Huhu. Mane tak nye, one semester of KPLI, I think we've been shaped into GERKO teacher more than Physics teacher...

I got SMK Bukit Ind@h. Heard a not so good reputation there... but hopefully everything will turn out okay for me .. ameen insyaAllah..