259: Mind-blown

When was the last time you had your mind blown? 

For me, it was just now, while reading a comment on facebook, one of the commentor put a gif of a spiralling model of our solar system. It was the first time of me seeing that model being simulated. I was mind-blown! 

I quickly headed to YouTube to searched the full video. Again, I was so mesmerized at how beautiful it was, the realization and the fact of how it makes such total sense, I felt like crying.

As a physics major who loves astrophysics (i chose astrophysics subjects until my final year during undergrad), this thing blows my mind. I mean, I know for a fact that our solar system moves around the galaxy, orbiting it, and the galaxy also moves in orbit around super cluster, and everything moves so rapidly as well because the universe is expanding, but when I saw the movement being simulated so beautifully and it create a helix, a vortex design looking like the dna double helix model, I was mind blown! 

It's beautiful, the theory and the simulation, and if you imagine it, that's what currently happening right now at this very moment, while we are living our mundane life right now, being oblivious at such beautiful grand design that is happening! The earth, the sun, the solar system, the galaxy, and everything, are dancing... So magnificently thru the expansion of the vast universe.

Subhanallah ...

Then I paused, and I thought about how I miss this feeling. Of being knocked to my senses by the knowledge, and how it relates with life. I miss the feeling .. I want to feel it again. 

Further study? 

258: Back again

Tomorrow, all students will come back to school. I'm teaching my students in real classes again, at last!. I love the opportunity to use all sort of technology to teach during MCO but it can never replace teaching face to face, hands down!

Nevertheless, many things that happened during early PKPP was teachers' dream came true. Like, only 10 students per class! No need to do group works, and no hands-on activities for students. Haha of course hands-on activities for students are good but if you have hyper students that always do the opposite of your instructions, this sort of set up of just stay at your own place, listen to your teacher spoon-feeding you, are so much appreciated. Much needed break.

Anyway, starting tomorrow, most things are back like before. Full house of more than 30 students in a class again. But its okay. I had a wonderful 3 weeks of teaching small classes 😄. Good things don't last but at least I got to experience them.

257: New normal

Now life has reverted to normal. Well, not actually the normal we used to before the pandemics, though. New normal, that is the phrase.

I still go out in the morning to go to school at the same time, around 6:40 am. But the road are clearer since most students haven't gone back to school yet (only the form 5-ers). When we reach school, temperature is taken at the school gate and recorded daily. Any temperature above 37.5 won't be allowed to enter. But three weeks in, no such cases are heard yet in my school.

Just early this year I felt so relieved because I didn't have to teach form 5, I alternate with another teacher. So this year is my turn taking the new KSSM batch, the form 4. New syllabus, I was excited. The last batch I taught which was also the first batch I taught for form 4 and 5 Physics received their SPM result with all passes. Alhamdulillah. Then coronavirus happened. MCO started just as the half-semester break started.

Around early June we learned that only the form 5 would be allowed to go to school at the first phase of school opening. Ah, I was needed to teach form 5 again. But I wasn't complaining. In this phase in life, where everything is so uncertain and out of our initial plan and so far away from expectations, we need to learn to be positive, taking in everything as a long journey of building ourselves. After all, I've been missing teaching students in class. Online learning has its perk but it can never compete to teaching face to face. I'll take it!

256: 2020

It's 2020! But all our expectations of how the year would be are totally off. We thought we would have flying car at least, but in reality, even airplanes cannot fly. I, on the other hand, am very thankful with the situation I am in. I'm trying to be positive here, because things seem so bleak, we still cannot fathom the seriousness of this virus situation although we are 3 months in our restrictive movement order.

Anyway, like I said, I am grateful that I am home with my family. I am thankful for still having a paid job. I am thankful my parents and in-laws are still within reach. I am eternally grateful that my husband is always by my side. I am thankful that my children are all home, healthy, within my sights. The biggest of our worries is going out, so the solution is just to stay home. And home, with abundance of food, internet connection, vast living hall for the kids to play and run around, a yard compound so we can go outside once in a while ... 

... why won't I feel blessed to stay home? while others don't have any choices because they are frontliners, or because they've been sacked so they need to do odd jobs 24/7, or their house is so crammed with dozens people but only 2 bedrooms, one phone to be shared with the whole family for online learning? and many other unfortunate circumstances that I am so grateful to Allah I don't have to endure.

And with that of course we who are advantageous should do what we can to help. What we have in hand is never ours. What we give out to others, that is our real inheritance that can help us in the hereafter.

I guess that's it for now, after long years of hiatus! I never forget the good feel of blogging, I need to start again. I miss the innocence of it, the 'quietness' ,unlike the social media, if you know what I mean.