Saturday, December 12, 2009

144:

Assalamualaikum wbt

Subhanallah. Alhamdulillah.

Semalam ke uni, uruskan beberapa urusan. Ambil academic transcript sebab kena post ke Monash and RMIT. Excited sangat bila dapat transcript tu.. sebab bawah tu tulis:


Macam tak percaya. All those sleepless nights, countless mug of coffees, anxiousness, agitation, kebersepahan bilik with notes, paper n ketidakurusan hidup (this, Mar had to withstand, thank you Mar atas kesabaranmu.. next year we are no longer roommate huhu, you're gonna miss me.. ni kene buat post lain nih!).. the only thing I didn't do is cry in frustration or distress. Haha. Tak percaya it has concluded to this day. Inna ma'al usri yusra.. but the verse doesn't end there, does it? ;)

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Sangat-sangat terkejut semalam bila dapat berita tentang Kak Teh. You can read the news here. Sungguh kita tak boleh, can never predict, whatever that's going to happen. Sungguh Allah memilih hambaNya yang Dia sayang utk ujian seberat ini..

I'm reflecting... the last week was very stressful for me since I was in a state of uncertain. Sangat takut tak pass, I thought of the worst, and all the what-ifs. Selalu juga cakap kat diri "So what if you didn't pass? what's the worst that can happen? bukannya its the end of the world.. extend je la, bukan the main reason you wanted to do honours sebab you nak stay longer ke here?"

Tapi hati tetap tak alleviated. Nak pass, nak pass. Then it struck me. Sungguh egonya diri. Kenapa tak nak tak pass? Sebab takut orang kata. Sebab ego, sebelum ni okay je, tak pernah fail. Bajet bagus sangat, padahal segalanya Allah yang tetapkan. You are nothing without Him.

Ujian sekecil ini tapi hati dah stress menggila. Orang lain ujian lebih berat kot, Mai! Fail tu, ujian yang tak semua orang dapat. Korang memang kuat...

Tetibe stuck tak tahu nak tulis apa. Huu..

Anyway, yang penting, yang seharusnya, tak kira kecil atau besar satu-satu ujian itu, kita kembali kepada Allah yang menetapkan ujian. Kita dapat extract the hikmah sebaliknya. Dapat react with the right reaction... mendapat redhaNya.. mendapat pengajaran for the future... and never commit the same mistake twice...

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Allahumma afrigh alaina sobran wathabbit aqdamana..

2 comments:

Aneesah said...

=\ Tadi ade baca article tu jugak, but forwarded by a Notts archie senior. Dgr kata arwah tu used to study at Notts...

Innalillah.


On another note, congrats again Mai. I sangat2 understand about ujian2 ni lately... kekadang benda kecik je (like not being able to figure out mane nak selit fire escape staircase in the plan), so so tiny just drives me nuts and cam nak breakdown, padahal... gosh.. it's not even REAL. Astaghfirullah. We really need to turn to Allah more often.

mardhiyyah mohd pauzi said...

hihi.glemer i kejap kt sini!

tau tak saya ada tak sampai seminggu lagipun kat melbourne ni..

hmm..maybe dah tak tidur rumah dah..hukhuk..

aih..kena buat post jugak ni..hehe..

:(..tetiba sedih..